Directed by Alvin Rakoff [Other horror films: Three Dangerous Ladies (1977, segment ‘Mrs. Amworth’)]
Death Ship had a potential that it didn’t at all live up to, which is a shame, as a movie like this really could have been something special. As it is, I just ended up bored most of the time.
There’s plenty of positive things about this film. The setting, an old, abandoned Nazi ship, is creepy, especially a room devoted to all things Hitler. The atmosphere is solid, and showing empty corridors, or the gears grinding, really brings forth a spooky vibe. Heck, there’s even quite a few creepy sequences, such as the net of bones, or the freezer full of dead bodies, or that one torture room. Combine that with a few golden deaths, and all should be well.
The problem is the film is rather slow, and much like a ship anchored at sea, oftentimes doesn’t feel like it’s going anywhere. Not all that much really happens, which is a shame, as, like I said, the setting certainly had a lot of potential. George Kennedy’s performance toward the end was suitably creepy, but without a story to really back that up, it felt a bit stale. Richard Crenna is perhaps the only actor who can transcend the mediocre script, and does well for himself, but like Kennedy, it feels his character doesn’t really do all that much.
Unfortunately, the movie’s just slow, and while there are some interesting ideas here (a Nazi ship trolling the waters in search of people to torture/interrogate for eternity is a fun plot), and some creepy scenes, but it’s not enough to make up for the lack of flair. Overall, Death Ship isn’t terrible, but it’s just not that good, and certainly below average.
Directed by Andy Muschietti [Other horror films: Mama (2013), It (2017)]
Being an almost three-hour movie, and with a lot of new additions compared to both the source novel and 1990 mini-series, there’s a lot in It Chapter Two to try and digest even now.
I think that one of the highlights of the film is during the flashbacks to when they were kids, especially the clubhouse scene. It’s just nice seeing the young cast coming back and giving more solid performances. Related, I appreciated how they led to these flashbacks, pointing out that the first movie didn’t cover everything the Losers went through, and revealing new information to the audience via these new flashbacks, which was a fun technique.
That leads into a journey to collect tokens (not too different from the Walking Tours in the book, mostly), which was okay. I didn’t love it, nor understand the importance of some of the tokens, but it made sense in the context of preparing for some Native American ritual in order to defeat Pennywise (which itself is something a bit new and somewhat unnecessary in my view).
As far as performances go here, the clear standout is Bill Hader as Richie. He gives a fantastic performance throughout, often bring levity to dark situations, as he did as a kid. A great scene was his joke in the clubhouse, which was entirely tasteless and entirely Richie. Also, toward the end, he has a breakdown of sorts, and the emotions coming from him are almost overwhelming in their sincerity. Just utterly fantastic.
Related, I thought that Eddie’s actor, James Ransone (most well-known for Sinister), was also pretty spectacular. He really did feel like a grown-up Jack Dylan Grazer, and his character was a lot of fun, especially his conversational repertoire with Hader. The third best adult performance was probably Mike’s Isaiah Mustafa, who gave a solid, somewhat manic at times, performance, and didn’t really feel too far removed from Tim Reid’s in 1990. Andy Bean as an adult Stanley Uris was great too, though I wish he appeared more.
As for Jay Ryan, Jessica Chastain, and James McAvoy, there were decent, but weren’t really that amazing. I did like McAvoy’s performance at times, especially regarding the Georgie surrogate, and he really comes across as unhinged at times (understandably so, if truth be told), but he didn’t blow me away, nor did Ryan or Chastain. For the life of me, I couldn’t see Ryan as an adult Jeremy Ray Taylor, which hurt his character a bit for me, and Chastain, while appearing reasonably similar to her childhood version of Lillis, just didn’t bring enough to wow me.
Seeing Sophia Lillis, Finn Wolfhard, Jack Dylan Grazer, and Wyatt Oleff (who played one of my favorite characters in the first chapter) again was great. I wish we had more flashbacks of the times they spent together that were missed from the first film, but what we got worked out just fine.
Some scenes I like include, but at not limited to, the opening sequence (which was in the books, and I was nice to finally see that put onto film), Pennywise’s encounter with a little girl during a football game, young Ben’s encounter with Beverly at summer school, and finally seeing Paul Bunyan attack Richie (as he did in the book, but wasn’t included in the 1990 mini-series). Admittedly, Pennywise’s singing in that last scene took me aback, but it made sense in context.
Also, kudos to Stephen King’s appearance in the film, along with the snatch of Bill’s writing we saw toward the end of the film, which was almost taken word-for-word from the original novel, page 769 in my paperback copy. Just a small thing, but that paragraph was almost one of my favorite’s from the novel, so it was nice to see the nod to it. And King’s joke about how his stories end? Fun times.
So what doesn’t work? Well, they add something new to Richie’s character that I don’t think was necessary, though I don’t hate it as I suspect some viewers will. The heavy use of CGI was a bit daunting at times, especially toward Beverly’s encounter with It as an adult and the whole of the finale. The vision cave sequence didn’t do a lot for me, and the final recitation of Ben’s haiku just felt so Hollywood.
Another thing – Henry Bowers coming back didn’t really change anything about the events of the movie – sure, both Eddie and Mike got hurt, but unlike the book and the 1990 version, Mike is still able to accompany them down into the sewers, so what did Bowers accomplish? Lastly, the way that they defeat Pennywise in the end just felt ridiculous to me, and if I could have one thing in this movie changed, it would be that, because it definitely was done better in the book and, dare I say, the 1990 mini-series.
A few scenes felt something out there, such as Eddie’s encounter in the basement of the pharmacy, or portions of the final encounter (the final form was okay, in a CGI-riddled way, but the 1990 version did a better job following the source novel), but over time, I’m guessing that these scenes will do more for me.
There are a few things I wish the movie had added from the book, including the downfall of Derry during an epic storm as the group confronts Pennywise. In the book, that was such a great sequence, seeing outside characters who we’ve heard and seen throughout the book dying, or nearly escaping death, and seeing just how screwed up Derry is like to be following Pennywise’s demise.
Also, writing out the important parts that Audra and Tom play in the book is an interesting choice. Obviously, Tom wasn’t any more important in the 1990 version than he was here, but Audra was reduced too, which I’m personally okay with (her love story with Bill in the novel is perhaps the least engaging part of the book for me, though she does has a really creepy interaction with Pennywise). That said, leaving these two out but bringing in Henry Bowers just felt off to me, especially since, as aforementioned, Bowers didn’t really accomplish anything.
Like I said at the beginning, there’s a lot to digest in this movie, especially as a fan of the source novel and the 1990 mini-series, not to mention the first chapter. As it stands, I can say that the first chapter probably felt more ordered, because at times, Chapter Two can come across as a bit messy (perhaps by design). Having Pennywise go after the Losers in somewhat psychological ways (which was played up more here than in the novel) brought a little something new, as did other factors, that I’m not exactly sure yet how I feel about.
My theater performance was pretty stellar, though, so that’s good.
I can’t say many things for certain right now, but I can say that I think the first movie was better. I’ll need to see this a few more times before I come to a final conclusion, but as it stands now, divorcing myself from the rare experience of seeing a movie in theaters, I’ll give this one an average rating.
7/10
This movie was covered on the Fight Evil podcast, episode #14, so if you want to hear Chucky (@ChuckyFE) and myself discuss this, check it out.
Directed by Steven R. Monroe [Other horror films: House of 9 (2005), It Waits (2005), Sasquatch Mountain (2006), Left in Darkness (2006), Ogre (2008), Wyvern (2009), I Spit on Your Grave (2010), Mongolian Death Worm (2010), I Spit on Your Grave 2 (2013), The Exorcism of Molly Hartley (2015), Harland Manor (2021), Unborn (2022), Teardrop (2022)]
I will try to keep this brief, because the longer I dwell on this piece of crap, the more I just want to rate it a 0/10 and get it done with.
What few things does this made-for-TV Syfy movie get right? The forest is a nice setting. Occasionally there’s some decent gore (an okay dismemberment, a good leg-snapping, and a solid impalement). The story had potential. The plot twist, while somewhat pointless, was fine.
Nothing else was.
In typical bad-movie fashion, this was a bad movie. I totally didn’t expect the creepy old man these characters meet early on is actually a ghost. Oh wait, I did. I totally didn’t expect the ending where things look like they’ll be okay, but then the one surviving character finds out ‘IT’S NOT OVER‘. Oh wait, I did.
I don’t mind a few overused tropes now and again, but this movie was just full of dull, uninspired scenes. There was very little original about this film, which might be okay if they had a competent director or a story that had more suspense and less pointless jump scares.
Some occasionally good gore aside, though, I don’t see what value this movie possesses. None of the actors or actresses were necessarily terrible, but no one wowed me either. If you want a bad movie, you might want to check this out. If you want a movie where you basically know where it’s going from the beginning, Grave Halloween may be your flick. If you want a movie of value, though, I’d suggest looking elsewhere.
Directed by Andrew Jordan [Other horror films: N/A]
I have never in my life seen such an inept mess.
Really, I’m not entirely sure what to say about this one. The story, such as it was, seems incomplete. And in fact, so does the movie as a whole. Amber Lynn (who is best known for various roles in adult movies) literally just reads her dialogue off cue cards as a newscaster, adding literally nothing to the movie. Some of the dialogue is dubbed after the fact, which is painfully obvious. The lighting, the dialogue, the everything, it’s a mess.
The one thing this Canadian flick sort of gets right is the gore. Oh, most of the time, it was the blood of insect things (origins never really explained), but there was a scene of a guy being tortured (that had zero relevance to the plot, I’ll add) that was decent, and a guy lost some fingers. The gore wasn’t necessarily amazing, partially because the camera-work was so shoddy, but it still stood out in what otherwise was an atrocity of a film.
Honestly, though, this movie possesses some charm to it – the gore is, as I said, moderately solid, and while everything else fails (from the post-sync dubbing, to the lighting, acting, story, and any other element you could think to name), sitting back with some friends and watching this movie play out would be a hoot. Watching it alone? It might change you, but not really for the better.
Things is pretty much an inept, illogical mess. Some scenes don’t make any sense, there’s no context to some of the story, and everything seems pretty disjointed (at times, this felt sort of like The Suckling, but most of the time, Things defies comparison), which the post-dubbing doesn’t help with at all. Can Things be enjoyable in the right situation? Sure. But is it a film that I’m clamoring to see again? Oh God, no.
That said, anyone interested should definitely watch this, as a review can’t possibly do this bizarre film justice.
Generally speaking, this is one of Syfy’s better attempts at an original film. It’s not as fun as previous enjoyable efforts (such as 2010’s House of Bones), but it’s still pretty decent for what they were aiming for.
The story isn’t really dripping in originality, but I do think it was pretty okay for a Syfy production. The “ten years later” epilogue was absolutely horrible, and it’s possible that scene alone lost the movie a whole point, but honestly, I’m hard-pressed to find endings of modern horror films I actually care for to begin with.
The Stickman, a CGI atrocity, isn’t the scariest thing I’ve seen. While the elongated fingers/claws are decently menacing, the creature as a whole is pretty weak. It doesn’t help that every other time it popped up on screen was meant as a jump scare. There were some subtler scenes, sure, but for the most part, just jump scare following jump scare.
Our main actress, Hayley Law, was more-or-less decent throughout the film, though her hysterics at times got a bit much (which can truthfully be said for most of the cast). I expected more out of Zoe De Grand Maison’s character, but the actress herself was fine. Same with Sara Garcia – expected more would come from her as the movie progressed, but we got nothing. Really, though, for a bunch of mostly limited-experienced actresses, I’d say most of these young women did adequate.
Director Sheldon Wilson has directed a handful of movies in the past I’ve enjoyed, such as 2015’s The Unspoken and 2017’s Neverknock. Others, such as 2007’s Kaw, 2009’s Carny, and 2011’s Killer Mountain have been the more generic Syfy fair. The Hollow, from 2015, was downright dreadful.
Stickman isn’t amazing, and the overuse of plenty of horror clichés gets old, but it’s still one of his better attempts, and for a Syfy film, I’d even say it’s worth a watch. Just don’t expect too much.
Directed by William Brent Bell [Other horror films: Stay Alive (2006), The Devil Inside (2012), Wer (2013), Brahms: The Boy II (2020), Separation (2021), Orphan: First Kill (2022)]
I saw this in theaters shortly after it came out, and while I didn’t love it, I thought it was sort of interesting, albeit generic at times. Seeing it again for the first time in a few years, I pretty much feel the same way, which, in this case, is mostly positive, as the story’s grown on me.
The best part about this film is the atmosphere, hands down. It’s a dim mansion, and while there are jump scares, I feel more of the frightening portions are subtle. There’s a dream sequence I could have done without, but for the most part, I think the scares come honestly.
What helps is the cast of about two people. Sure, Brahms’ parents, played by Jim Norton and Diana Hardcastle, are both fantastic, but neither has much screen-time. Ben Robson doesn’t show up until the end, and he’s not exactly oozing with interesting character traits (though to be fair, it’s more due to the script than Robson himself).
So who we have to entertain us for most of the film, providing you don’t count the creepy Brahms doll, are Lauren Cohan and Rupert Evans. Cohan does a pretty fair job throughout, and after discovering the doll’s more active than it should be, really comes across as crazy at times. Evans, who has previously appeared in such horror films as Asylum Blackout (or The Incident) from 2011 and The Canal from 2014, has a very enjoyable performance here, and really, he comes across as quite charming. Luckily, Cohan and Evans worked quite well together, which is great, as they were about the only important characters in the film.
Gore certainly wasn’t much a factor here, and really, special effects weren’t needed, as the film kept things pretty simple. Like I said, it’s the atmosphere that’s most commendable, but certainly the performances listed above help out. What also can’t be ignored is the moderately creepy mansion, which looked great and certainly helped add to the already well-done atmosphere.
The biggest issue with The Boy is that it sort of meanders a bit toward the middle of the film, which was fine for character building, but it’s not the most exciting material. That said, I did like how Cohan’s character’s personal issues tied in well enough to the film’s plot, and certainly gave her reason to want to stay after discovering the doll she was hired to watch over was alive.
The Boy didn’t really garner much attention when it came out (the director, William Brent Bell, hasn’t done that much before this, though he did director 2013’s Wer, one of the more interesting modern werewolf films), and I can sort of see why. Personally, I think it’s an enjoyable film with some solid acting, good suspense and atmosphere, and delightful misdirection, leading to a rather fun conclusion. While not a masterpiece, upon seeing this film again, and outside of a theater experience, I can say that it’s a solid film and I’d recommend it.
Directed by Bruce Pittman [Other horror films: Mark of Cain (1985)]
Nothing at all in tone or style like the first Prom Night, Hello Mary Lou drops the slasher aspect of the classic 1980 film and instead adopts a possession story, which actually works well to the film’s benefit.
If you’re a fan of 80’s flicks in general, I can’t see how this film would disappoint you. The story, while not overly original, is still pretty fun. Decent special effects, and even a good atmosphere at times. First, though, let’s talk about the actors and actresses, who do quite a bit to boost enjoyment in this film.
There are a hell of a lot of solid performances here. Michael Ironside doesn’t disappoint as the principle with a dark past. An early performance by Louis Ferreira is probably more enjoyable than it should be. Brock Simpson (who actually not only had a small role in the first movie, but has appeared in all four Prom Night films, each time playing a different character) does pretty well as a rather spaced-out and, shall we say unique, high school student. Always a pleasure when he came on screen.
The two best performances, though, go to the star, Wendy Lyon, and though with only a few appearances, Beth Gondek. Lyon did commendable throughout, and really got the most of her role as she could. She had a lot of heart, and really helped make the film more fun. Gondek, despite being a bit of a no one (including this film, she has a total of seven credits on IMDb), really stole the few scenes she was in. There’s a rather emotional portion when she’s talking to Lyon, and I’ll be damned if I didn’t buy every word. I really wish she got more screen-time than she did, as she did amazing.
Special effects throughout were generally pretty good. The rocking horse was a bit odd, and there was a dodgy-looking electrocution toward the end, but the blackboard scene was pretty cool, as was a mirror sequence. There was some legitimate suspense during the locker room scene, and it ended in a decently gory way. That said, gore wasn’t a strong point here, but the deaths we do get all end up fun regardless.
At times, the film sort of felt like the fourth A Nightmare on Elm Street, albeit a bit more tepid. Lyon, all out of sorts after the death of a friend, keeps having visions while at school, and some of them are even decently creepy. There’s a good atmosphere during those sequences also.
And if none of this grabs you, if you hold on long enough, there’s some solid nudity nearing the end of the flick.
Hello Mary Lou: Prom Night II is a lot of fun, certainly funner than the original. Solid performances, good story, and everything just seems to work out. It’s not perfect, of course – at times, I can’t pretend it doesn’t drag a little bit. And the ending, while sort of fun, in a cheesy way, doesn’t really do it for me. But overall, I really liked this when I first saw it some years back, and it still holds up. Definitely an 80’s horror flick I’d recommend checking out.
8.5/10
This is one of the films discussed on the Fight Evil show, so if interested, listen to Chucky (@ChuckyFE) and I talk about it a bit.
Directed by David Winning [Other horror films: Storm (1987), Black Swarm (2007), Swamp Devil (2008)]
For some reason, I’ve seen this television flick at least twice before I sat down and watched it this time around. I’m not sure why I’d have watched this again, but having seen it now at least three times, I will admit there’s a little charm to it.
Something Beneath doesn’t really have that interesting a story, and for the most part, the deaths and special effects aren’t all that impressive. One of the sequences in particular reminded me of a scene from the 2003 Fear of the Dark (a personal favorite of mine), which was sort of amusing. Overall, you can certainly tell this film has an amateurish quality to it.
So where’s the charm come from, you might ask?
Luckily, enough of the important actors were decent enough to bring some positives to this film. No doubt Brittany Scobie and Brendan Beiser were over-the-top, but Kevin Sorbo and Natalie Brown complimented each other decently well. Sorbo, playing an Episcopalian priest (a joke about it halfway through the movie always sort of made me smile) does a good job, and though he has some foolish things to say about faith now and again, Sorbo was certainly a highlight. Brown isn’t a name I’m well-acquainted with, but she was pretty attractive in this role, and more importantly, worked well with Sorbo (though the cheesy ending was a bit much).
Some of the actors weren’t great, but didn’t do too shabby either, including Peter MacNeill, Gordan Tanner, and Brett Donahue. While none of these three really stood out that well, at the very least they were competent in their roles, which, for a movie of this quality, is commendable.
The ending was pretty blah, but again, that’s sort of to be expected. Really, the movie is pretty generic throughout, and some of the characters are just, as I said, over-the-top. It doesn’t help that occasionally the film has a whimsical tone to it. All of this said, Something Beneath isn’t god-awful, and might be worth a look. Having seen it as many times as I’ve had, I find it below average, but it’s not really all that atrocious. Like I said, there is some charm to be found here.
Directed by Eli Craig [Other horror films: Zombieland (2013), Little Evil (2017)]
This will be a shorter review than usual, as there’s not much to say about this film (in this case, it’s a positive).
If you don’t know much about this bloody comedy-horror flick, it might sound a bit dumb at first. And sure, in some ways, it is overly ridiculous. But at the same time, I do think the theme of miscommunication is done pretty cleverly throughout the movie.
There are only four actors who matter. Tucker (Alan Tudyk) and Dale (Tyler Labine) have an amazing chemistry as two hillbilly friends, and play their roles fantastically. Dale has a lot of heart in him, and it’s nice to see his story end happily. Katrina Bowden played Allison, an aspiring therapist caught in the middle of this giant misunderstanding, extraordinarily well also. She has a fresh, attractive college look to her, but also has the brains to figure out what’s going on. Jesse Moss (who was in Ginger Snaps ten years prior) plays a great villain, and gets the utterly psychotic act down pat.
The movie is about average length, but still comes across as pretty digestible, and at no parts throughout the film are you really bored. The gore and related special effects are pretty damn good, lending this movie the right to probably be called a splatter film. Solidly funny, surprisingly clever, Tucker and Dale vs Evil is a good film that’s worth seeing. I think you’ll enjoy it.
8/10
This was also covered in the first episode of Fight Evil’s podcast, as Chucky (@ChuckyFE) and I briefly discuss it, which you can listen to below.
Directed by Jesse Thomas Cook [Other horror films: Scarce (2008), Monster Brawl (2011), Septic Man (2013), The Hoard (2018), Deadsight (2018)]
Given it’s atrocious title, you might not be surprised to learn that The Hexecutioners is a bad film. The good elements are as followed: Liv Collins does a decent job with her role, and there’s some cool scenes toward the end.
But everything else? Failure. The story doesn’t give us many, if any, answers. The ending is absolutely and thoroughly terrible. Some of the jump scares seem unnecessary. Overall, the movie, despite a somewhat unique plot, doesn’t have a good hexecution. :p
I really don’t have much to say – the story suffered due to a lack of context, spirits/ghosts just popped up and were never explained. It’s just a disjointed and uneven movie. The okay acting by Collins isn’t enough to save it, nor are the visually appealing scenes when they come up. Though this is far shorter than most of my reviews, I’ve found I just don’t have that much to say about it. A sub par film; would not recommend.
Jiggy's Horror Corner 