2000’s – Page 20 – Jiggy's Horror Corner

The Strange Case of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde (2006)

Directed by John Carl Buechler [Other horror films: Ragewar (1984, segment ‘Demons of the Dead’), Troll (1986), Cellar Dweller (1988), Friday the 13th Part VII: The New Blood (1988), Ghoulies III: Ghoulies Go to College (1991), Watchers Reborn (1998), Deep Freeze (2002), Curse of the Forty-Niner (2002), Saurian (2006), The Eden Formula (2006)]

This film truly feels like a TV movie. I saw this once before, years and years ago on Chiller, and thought the same thing. But despite how much it really seems to be a TV movie, it’s not, which is utterly mind-boggling, as that would have gone a long way to explaining this.

Starring Tony Todd as Dr. Jekyll, this movie is atrocious in most ways. Mr. Hyde’s endless barrage of bad quips combined with the less than stellar acting of both Tracy Scoggins and Danielle Nicolet, not to mention the utter lack of true mystery or suspense, makes this quite a difficult job to get through. The story, a modern adaptation of Robert Louis Stevenson’s work, leaves much to be desired. Some corny special effects are sprinkled throughout the film, and the gore we do get isn’t all that well done.

The highlight of this movie really is Tony Todd, who, while his acting isn’t amazing, can make you feel for the troubles of Dr. Jekyll. But Scoggins’ performance as a police officer with an aversion to guns was pretty bad, and indeed, most actors and actresses in this film didn’t do that well, though I do think that’s more the fault of what they had to work with as opposed to their own abilities.

The director of this travesty is John Carl Buechler, well known for the special effects of countless 80’s horror films (such as TerrorVision, Troll, Halloween 4, A Nightmare on Elm Street 4, Friday the 13th Part VII, and From Beyond) and directing such films as Troll (1986), Friday the 13th Part VII: The New Blood (1988), and Curse of the Forty-Niner (2002) (among others, as above shines light on). While it’s not an unimpressive resume, he wasn’t able to make this movie work whatsoever, and as I said, more than anything, it’s a chore to get through. The Strange Case of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde is a failure on almost every front, the one shining light being Tony Todd. But that’s not enough to save this. A subpar film in every way – it’s a shame I saw it twice.

4/10

The Devil’s Tattoo (2003)

Directed by Julian Kean [Other horror films: N/A]

This movie (which, while known as Ghost Rig, is originally titled The Devil’s Tattoo) isn’t all that amazing, not by any stretch. I saw it many years back on Chiller, and all-in-all, it never really came to mind, aside from the basics of the plot (a group of environmentalists take over an oil rig, only to discover nobody’s left, and are soon picked off by an evil force that goes from body to body). Still, it’s not exactly a bad movie either. It’s main problem is how unoriginal the premise is. An evil entity going from host to host, pitting those left against each other, unsure of who they could trust, isn’t exactly new territory. Aside from similarities to The Thing, which are fair enough, I’m also reminded of the classic Horror Express (1972). Even so, The Devil’s Tattoo is passable.

Though it’s not overly thrilling for most of the film, I do think the last twenty minutes or so (which includes more than one plot twist) were pretty enjoyable. All-in-all, this movie’s around average, maybe a little less. It’s quality certainly isn’t worthy of praise, nor most of the acting (Noel Fitzpatrick in particular does a good job, though), but it’s a good movie to pass the night with.

7/10

Kuntilanak (2006)

Directed by Rizal Mantovani [Other horror films: Jelangkung (2001), Kuntilanak 2 (2007), Kuntilanak 3 (2008), Kesurupan (2008), Mati suri (2009), Air Terjun Pengantin (2009), Taring (2010), Jenglot Pantai Selatan (2011), Air Terjun Pengantin Phuket (2013), Wewe (2015), Firegate (2016), Jailangkung (2017), Bayi Gaib: Bayi Tumbal Bayi Mati (2018), Kuntilanak (2018), Jailangkung 2 (2018), Tembang Lingsir (2019), Kuntilanak 2 (2019), Rumah Kentang: The Beginning (2019), Rasuk 2 (2020), Asih 2 (2020), Kuntilanak 3 (2022)]

Known in English as The Chanting, Kuntilanak has the distinction of being the first Indonesian horror film I’ve seen thus far. How does it hold up? It’s a mixed bag, but overall, while below average, it’s okay.

Now, some of my perceived shortcomings come not from the film itself, but from the quality of the upload I happened to view. The audio had an echoey feel to it, the English subtitles weren’t the best, and the video quality was on the grainy side. As best as possible, I will not let these technical aspects hamper my review.

Julie Estelle plays our main character, and as she moves into a boarding house near a cemetery, the young woman becomes the medium to a pontianak, or kuntilanak, and hell follows with. The beginning and middle portions of the film are a bit dull, as far as I was concerned. The setting was on par with what I’d hope to expect; a spooky boarding house near a cemetery is just what the doctor called for. And our main actress, Estelle, is a very attractive young woman. But it takes 45 minutes or so for the movie to really pick up. And when it does, it’s not exactly amazing.

For every cool, if not dated, jump scene the movie presents, it also brings with them elements I wasn’t fond of, such as the fact our main character herself has (rudimentary) control of the aforementioned kuntilanak. Also, there’s a Satanist element thrown in also, which, even with the ending sequence, didn’t do much for me.

Lastly, as far as negatives go, the last split second of the film was a jump scare, which has always annoyed me. Still, it’s not all bad. Many of the scenes with the kuntilanak were suspenseful, and there were plenty of frightening sequences to keep you happy (past the first 45 minutes, that is). The ending was a decent one, though not wholly unsurprising. Kuntilanak wasn’t an overly spectacular film, but it held up well given its deficits.

If most Indonesian horror films came out like this, even with my rating not being amazing, it’d still indeed be something to applaud. On a quick side note, there are two sequels to this film, 2007 and 2008 respectively, and while I don’t know how they compare to this one, I do know that Estelle appears in those also. As for this one, though, it’s not a great movie, but a decent one, somewhere around average.

6.5/10

My Little Eye (2002)

Directed by Marc Evans [Other horror films: Trauma (2004)]

Maybe back in 2002, this movie was fresh, but this is the second time I’ve seen it, and still, it doesn’t do a hell of a lot for me. Horror movies based off reality television can often be risky – you get a lot of bad movies, such as Reality Check (2002) and Cruel World (2005). This isn’t nearly as bad as those two, but it is very average.

Plot twists you see coming a mile away. Atrocious early 2000’s techno music played incessantly toward the end. Unnecessary slow motion scenes. Heck, I don’t even think the conclusion is all that satisfying.

There are some good parts, though – some of the characters are bearable, and one of the kills (though annoyingly done in night vision view) was sort of cool. Overall, though, while My Little Eye is, by some people, called a gem of the time (which may be true), this is the second time I’ve been disappointed by it, and I don’t anticipate that to change with a third viewing.

6/10

Fear Island (2009)

Directed by Michael Storey [Other horror films: N/A]

Fear Island isn’t a great movie, and that mainly stems from the fact that from the beginning, as an audience, we can sort of see where it’s going.

Unreliable narrators are sometimes fantastic (The Usual Suspects comes to mind), and sometimes not so much, because there comes a point in which something is overdone, and it loses what it otherwise could have had. I feel that happened here

The story isn’t that bad: A girl is found on an island with six bodies, and she recounts her tale to the police, who are at first suspicious, but grow to accept what she says. And we have twists throughout. Or maybe there aren’t, as unreliable narrators can leave things out, lie, etc.

I liked how this movie was set up. But it was made past the time in which these types of movies weren’t uncommon. Hell, it’s moderately similar to The Hole, and that came out way back in 2001. So no, Fear Island’s not great. Some potential inconsistencies, almost no gore, somewhat annoying characters, idiotic characters, and unnecessary twists. You could do worse, though, for a television movie, and despite the problems, it’s certainly a movie that tried. Less than average, pretty generic even, but not disastrously so.

6/10

Hatchet (2006)

Directed by Adam Green [Other horror films: Frozen (2010), Hatchet II (2010), Chillerama (2011, segment ‘The Diary of Anne Frankenstein’), Digging Up the Marrow (2014), Victor Crowley (2017)]

Hatchet’s not nearly as good a film as I remember it being, but it’s still mostly amusing and a fun romp. I can’t ignore some of the problems Hatchet has, though overall, I think the film’s still enjoyable, if not a bit below average.

My biggest personal gripe is that some of the scenes have a bit too much comedy in them. The character Marcus, played by Dion Richmond, was just too much, and though he had some solid quotes (“You look like you’ve been molested by wolves!”), I could have done without a lot of his antics.

Otherwise, the rest of the cast was okayish. The main character, played by Joel David Moore, was definitely a bit on the awkward side, but he made for an interesting lead. Amara Zaragoza’s Marybeth had a bit of depth to her, but her (understandably) emotional moments toward the end bothered me a bit.

Of course, there’s cameos from both Robert Englund and Tony Todd. I think Todd’s was quite a bit more amusing than Englund’s, but both are fun to see (and add to the retro feeling that Hatchet was going for). Richard Riehle was fun in his role, and Parry Shen too had a decent performance.

It’s the gore here, though, more than the characters, that bring the film attention, and for good reason. Aside from the one off-screen kill (which was suspenseful in it’s own right), you have some really solid and gory kills here, the most spectacular probably being the jaw and head being ripped in half. There’s also someone’s head getting twisted backwards, along with someone’s spine being ripped out, along with someone’s torso halved, along with someone’s arms being ripped off. I mean, this isn’t your grandfather’s horror movie – it came to play.

The budget here is noticeably limited, but Hatchet definitely did well with what they had. In classic slasher fashion, they had a decently tragic origin for Victory Crowley (portions of which reminded me of Pumpkinhead), and I think it really brought his character into a sympathetic light. It doesn’t excuse the wholesale slaughter of anyone who enters the swamp, but there you go.

And on that note, the setting here, a swamp, is definitely appreciated. I always wished there was a classic slasher set in a swamp, because I think there’s a lot of creepy potential with such a setting (and no, I don’t count Eaten Alive). Hatchet may not be from the 1980’s, but hey, I’ll take it.

If there’s one thing along with the comedy that sort of throw me off, it’s the inconclusive cliffhanger of an ending. I sort of see the appeal, but I wanted a bit more than that. Still, Hatchet is a decently fun movie, and though I do find it ever-so-slightly below average, I can still see myself giving it a go every few years.

6.5/10

Hatchet was covered on episode #29 of Fight Evil’s podcast, so if you want to listen to Chucky (@ChuckyFE) and I discuss this, give it a go.

Spiders (2000)

Directed by Gary Jones [Other horror films: Mosquito (1994), Crocodile 2: Death Swamp (2002), Jolly Roger: Massacre at Cutter’s Cove (2005), Ghouls (2008), Boogeyman 3 (2008), Lightning Strikes (2009), Axe Giant: The Wrath of Paul Bunyan (2013)]

Spiders is a moderately low-quality romp, with ridiculous characters and rather dated-looking spider CGI. The story is slightly unique, in that the first hour and ten minutes take place in an underground military base, but for the final twenty minutes, the setting becomes a college campus and finally, the city as a whole. The last two portions seemed sort of jammed in there, just to make the film a bit longer – they certainly don’t feel in place.

That’s not to say this movie isn’t enjoyable – if you like lower-quality monster movies, then this one seems right down your alley. The “aliens” at the beginning of the film are hilarious, and the overacting of Mark Phelan, once you get used to it, is pretty amusing. And like I said, it’s just a ridiculous movie overall. Not bad, not great. Not a waste of time, though, so I guess it’s about slightly below average.

6.5/10

Cube 2: Hypercube (2002)

Directed by Andrzej Sekula [Other horror films: While We Sleep (2021)]

I liked this movie far more the last few times I saw it than I did upon rewatching it this time around. I enjoy many of the characters (or at least enough of them to make up for the ones I didn’t enjoy), and portions of the story are perfectly fine, but this film lacks the charm of it’s predecessor.

It possesses fewer trapped rooms than does the original, and while the bright white rooms bring a futuristic tone to the film, it doesn’t do much for a suspenseful vibe. As with the first Cube, though, the strong point is not the surroundings or the story (and certainly not the conclusion, or lack thereof), it’s the characters.

I’ll say that I much preferred the antagonist from the first film, but the characters of Jerry (a kind, thoughtful if not overly cheery, man) and Mrs. Paley (an older woman with dementia/Alzheimer’s) are both great. Jerry was the character who lacked the survival skills likely needed, but is an all-around good guy, whereas Paley’s character brought some pretty humorous moments to the film. This is not to say the other characters aren’t good, but some of them (the blind girl especially) became quite annoying as the movie pressed on.

The ending, while many disliked it, was one I felt was mostly acceptable. I do wish they delved more into the workings of the Hypercube, but the prequel gives us a small dose of that later on. Just a small note, I wasn’t a big fan of the alternate reality/dimensions portrayed in this film – different versions of the same character getting killed multiple times, to me, really dampens the emotional response to the death – but it was certainly an interesting route to take. Not a great movie, and nowhere near as good as the first Cube, but this was passable.

6.5/10

Hostel (2005)

Directed by Eli Roth [Other horror films: Cabin Fever (2002), Hostel: Part II (2007), The Green Inferno (2013), Knock Knock (2015), Thanksgiving (2023)]

I’ve always enjoyed Hostel. It’s gritty, somewhat violent, and overall has a good punch to it.

The basic idea is one that I’ve always found fascinating. While it’s expounded on in Part II, having a business around capturing foreigners and, for a fee, letting people torture and kill them is, as the kids say, neat-o. It’s a fun idea, and setting the factory where these mutilations and massacres take place in Slovakia adds to the charm. Technically, the movie is filmed in the Czech Republic, but Slovakia has a more sinister sound to it, and I always liked the idea. Oh, and that torture museum was beautiful.

Another thing that I’ve always rather enjoyed are the main characters. It’s true that Paxton (Jay Hernandez) starts off as a stereotypical American douchebag, as opposed to Josh (Derek Richardson), who is a more reserved, serious individual, but what makes this notable is that while Josh seems like a good candidate to be the focal point, he’s not. What they do with Paxton is impressive – humanizing him by first letting us know he’s a vegetarian, and then later, having him relay a tragic moment in his past. I never liked Paxton, as a character, when I start this film, but I always find him endearing come the finale, and can’t fault him for any of his actions.

Hernandez (also in Quarantine) does a pretty solid job here. After his friends go missing in Slovakia, he drops his whole party boy aesthetic and goes in detective mode, trying to figure out where they went. The personality of his character is an interesting one, and I think Jay Hernandez was well-suited for the role. Derek Richardson (Reeker) had a Breckin Meyer vibe to him, and I always liked Meyer, so he’s aces in my book. Eythor Gudjonsson had some occasional charm (such as it was), Jan Vlasák was appropriately creepy, and Radomil Uhlir (“You want to get stoned?”) was quality.

Naturally, when it comes to Hostel, the gore is what a lot of people bring up. Perhaps I’m somewhat jaded, but it doesn’t really seem that over-the-top. Sure, you have scenes of fingers being cut off, or a chainsaw cutting through someone’s leg, or perhaps a blowtorch to the face, or an eye being snipped off with a pair of scissors. There’s dismembered body parts being thrown into an incinerator (during a sequence as a whole that was fantastic), and people’s heads being beat in with blunt objects. Overall, it’s a somewhat gory film, but I really don’t know if it’s as bad as some might remember it being.

I can’t say when I first saw Hostel, but I can say that it’s held up every time I’ve revisited it. It’s possible that I enjoy the second movie a smidge more, but this one definitely has a lot going for it, and I’m personally happy that Eli Roth made a movie that’s far better than Cabin Fever. It is a minor shame that some characters didn’t have quite the ending you’d hope for, but the finale as a whole was rewarding, and as many times as I’ve seen this, I still find it a tense and satisfying ride.

7.5/10

Halloween (2007)

Directed by Rob Zombie [Other horror films: House of 1000 Corpses (2003), The Devil’s Rejects (2005), Halloween II (2009), The Haunted World of El Superbeasto (2009), The Lords of Salem (2012), 31 (2016), 3 from Hell (2019)]

I cannot express how much I despise the first 50 minutes of this film – I always have. Because I completely understand why Michael would kill his stepfather, his sister and her boyfriend. I can’t imagine a more annoying family than that. And therein lies the problem – I don’t want to understand why Michael is the way he is. It’s not necessary.

From the fourth Halloween film, Donald Pleasence’s character said it best: he’s evil on two legs. And while I appreciate what Zombie was trying to do, and I know he was told to make it his own, I cannot pretend that I enjoy the first half of this film. From the song “Love Hurts” to the quote “It hides my ugliness,” I just can’t help but cringe.

It does get better, though. Marginally. But Laurie’s character here is not the innocent girl from the original Halloween (her first scene, where she mimics being molested, shows us that) – her two friends are worse. In fact, there are few sympathetic characters here – funnily enough, I think the most sympathetic are Laurie’s parents, and we see what happened to them (same can be said for Danny Trejo’s character). We have some worthwhile sequences in this film, such as Laurie trying to escape from Michael nearing the end, but too much here just bothered me. Truth be told, the best character had such little time, and that, of course, would be Joe Grizzly. This might have some decent gore, but it’s just a disappointing movie, and a disappointing remake.

6/10