2009 – Page 3 – Jiggy's Horror Corner

The Lights (2009)

Directed by John Sjogren [Other horror films: N/A]

There’s basically only two reasons, as far as I can tell, to really seek this movie out. One, if you’re a slasher fan, and two, to see if Oscar Lusth can act (the answer is not really).

Oscar who? Well, many years back, I was a fan of the reality show Survivor, and Oscar, or Ozzy, has been a repeat contender, well-known for his strong athletic ability, outstripping almost every peer. In fact, since he first appeared on Survivor back in 2006, I’m surprised this DVD copy I have doesn’t milk the fact that they have Ozzy in the movie.

As it is, while it’s nice seeing a familiar (and unexpected) face, the novelty doesn’t really take long to wear off. That said, his character, Steve, is a decently fun guy. Other actors worth mentioning include the killer Kerry Wallum (not great acting, but a somewhat charming personality) and Joe Estevez (who has had well over two hundred roles). On the flipside, Elizabeth Jauregui had some of the worst delivery I’ve seen in a while. Part of the fault might lie with the script-writer (seriously, she was expected to tell a serial killer that the law says he shouldn’t kill her with a straight face?), but bad script aside, she was pretty weak.

None of the kills in the flick are excellent. Some quick-paced hammer attacks are nice, and an individual gets his arm chopped off in what’s probably my favorite scene, but overall, nothing really comes across as that memorable (including a dismemberment). And that final kill just didn’t look good.

There’s not really much to this movie, when all’s said and done. Some funny lines, some hammy acting, and sure, seeing half naked women is never bad, but the meandering start to the film, along with unspectacular kills, really don’t make this film one that stands out. I saw this first in October 2017, and for all the good a re-watch has done, I’d have been better served watching a plethora of other flicks. Not terrible, but below average.

6/10

Fear Island (2009)

Directed by Michael Storey [Other horror films: N/A]

Fear Island isn’t a great movie, and that mainly stems from the fact that from the beginning, as an audience, we can sort of see where it’s going.

Unreliable narrators are sometimes fantastic (The Usual Suspects comes to mind), and sometimes not so much, because there comes a point in which something is overdone, and it loses what it otherwise could have had. I feel that happened here

The story isn’t that bad: A girl is found on an island with six bodies, and she recounts her tale to the police, who are at first suspicious, but grow to accept what she says. And we have twists throughout. Or maybe there aren’t, as unreliable narrators can leave things out, lie, etc.

I liked how this movie was set up. But it was made past the time in which these types of movies weren’t uncommon. Hell, it’s moderately similar to The Hole, and that came out way back in 2001. So no, Fear Island’s not great. Some potential inconsistencies, almost no gore, somewhat annoying characters, idiotic characters, and unnecessary twists. You could do worse, though, for a television movie, and despite the problems, it’s certainly a movie that tried. Less than average, pretty generic even, but not disastrously so.

6/10

Hit and Run (2009)

Directed by Edna McCallion [Other horror films: N/A]

I’ve not seen this since either the 2009 or 2010 October Challenge. Either way, I think I disliked it even more this time around.

The good elements Hit and Run contains are as such: 1) the main actress, Laura Breckenridge, was pretty attractive, 2) the usage of the Modest Mouse song “Float On” was welcoming to the ears and 3) some of the scenes, specifically death scenes, were acceptable.

Everything else failed miserably, though.

Most prominently among them, you don’t feel an ounce of sympathy for the main character – whether she lives or dies, you really don’t care. You dislike her boyfriend even more, though. And it doesn’t help that you don’t feel much sympathy for the murderer past a certain point. It’s a movie with no sides to root for. Not only that, but some edits and cuts in this movie just look amateurish.

Now, some have commented that this film was trying to harken back to the days of 70’s/80’s slashers. If this was their intent, they failed miserably. After the initial incident, in which our main character runs someone over while driving home intoxicated, the movie almost turns into a character study. We see how she reacts, the trials of going through with burying the person she hit instead of letting the police know. And for 40 minutes, the horror elements are zilch.

If this character had been particularly interesting, or had this been done by the hands of a far more talented director, maybe it could have worked. For what it was, though, I was bored out of my mind. And when things do happen, it’s not particularly good. This is just a disappointment of a movie, and does many things wrong. The points I gave it come from the fact that while this film isn’t good, it’s certainly leagues above the worst horror films. It’s overly generic, and just overall not conducive to a fun viewing.

4/10