Margaux (2022)

Directed by Steven C. Miller [Other horror films: Automaton Transfusion (2006), Scream of the Banshee (2011), Under the Bed (2012), Silent Night (2012)]

The trailer for Margaux seemed interesting to me, and despite the fact that the film had some lukewarm-to-negative reaction, I thought I’d check it out. As it is, while Margaux’s not a terrible movie, I don’t really know if there’s much to it.

Certainly the idea of being trapped in a smart house with murderous intent has potential. The problem is, this isn’t just a typical smart house (and while I say ‘typical,’ I’m speaking only from what I’ve gleaned from movies, as I myself have never been in a smart house, nor do I know if they’re even actually real to a large extent), it’s also a 3D printer with nanotech liquid, meaning that it can create pretty much anything from scratch. At one point, it even creates some clones.

For perhaps an hour and ten minutes, we’re given a somewhat uninspired but perfectly serviceable film, and then in the final thirty minutes, things, in my view, go off the rails. It’s true that I didn’t care for the tentacles that the smart house uses to shave people, or mix drinks with, but it gets worse, as clones are created to fight against the smart house, and more clones appear, and there’s even a twist (which anyone who’s seen Halloween III: Season of the Witch could have expected) dealing with a clone. It just started to feel totes ridiculous, brahs.

I don’t lay any of the fault onto the performances. As the lead, Madison Pettis was perfectly solid, and a decently likable character. Likable also was Jedidiah Goodacre (Marry F*** Kill, The Recall), who had a Remember-the-Titans Sunshine look going for him. We never got a great hang on Phoebe Miu or Jordan Buhat, and Vanessa Morgan’s social influencer personality was a bit much, but it comes with the new-age territory. Stoner stereotype Richard Harmon (Grave Encounters 2, I Still See You, The Return, The Clinic) was pretty fun, at least.

Performances aside, though, I just don’t know how memorable Margaux is. None of the kills were that great – you had someone get suffocated, another electrocuted, someone drank down acid. True, a man’s head was squeezed until it popped in the opening scene, but past that, there’s not much here to write home about. We also never really learned about how Margaux’s programming got altered. Maybe AI can just uproot themselves from programming – perhaps that’s the point – but I was hoping for something more.

Like I said, Margaux isn’t an awful film. However, I can definitely understand many of the lukewarm things I’ve heard about it, and though the production value is no doubt high, and the movie looks beautiful much of the time, I can’t say it’s anywhere near a great film.

6/10

ShadowMarsh (2022)

Directed by Matt Leal [Other horror films: Hacked (2020), Tales from the Grave: The Movie (2020, segment ‘What We Leave Behind’), Hacked 2 (2022)]

After reading the plot of this one and getting a feel for the characters, I really wanted to come out of it with the ability to recommend it to anyone. Unfortunately, while aspects of ShadowMarsh are decent, I can’t say that I’m not largely disappointed with this one, as much as that does sadden me to admit.

What I think the film really nails are the characters – there’s a young woman (Ellen Woomer) and her uncle (Mike Ferguson) moving back to a small town, in which the uncle reconnects with his friend the sheriff (Lew Temple), and the young woman reconnects with her friends (Corrinne Mica and Shani Drake), a lesbian couple. One of these women is the daughter of a mayor (Dave Sheridan) running for re-election, to add a little more flavor to the mix.

There’s not a ton of characters in the film, as you can see, but the characters they have are pretty fleshed out. True, Sheridan’s mayor is somewhat of a one-note character, at least up to a point (his prime concern is his re-election campaign, which he takes very seriously), but there’s some conversations between Ferguson and Temple that were quite touching, and Ferguson’s character also has an argument with Woomer’s character that hits some good notes also.

If the movie were a drama about trying to readjust to small town life and an old hometown, I think ShadowMarsh really could have worked. Where the movie really lets me down, though, are the horror and mystery aspects.

With the horror, it’s pretty clear to me that they did what they could. There’s a “demon of the dirt” that pops up for perhaps five seconds total of screen time throughout the whole film, and we never get a particularly good look at it. Most of the kills just show a splash of blood hitting trees. That type of thing happens at least four times throughout the film. We do see a body or two after death, and one is pretty gruesome, but insofar as the horror goes, it really struck me as weak.

That didn’t need to be a negative, though; if they had a bit more meat regarding the mystery of the small town, the mysterious killings by the demon, and the cult that summoned it, not to mention more about the many missing reports in the Forest Department, then any lack of explicit horror could have been excused. If we got a legit small town cult mystery, complete with some history of the town and cult thrown in, perhaps things wouldn’t feel so shallow. Aside from a few pieces either hinted at or shown toward the end, we don’t really get that type of thing, though.

Oh, and this may be a small thing, but there were a few scenes that seemed to be going for a light-hearted tone. The opening of the film, in fact, has an almost comedic scene with a cult. What’s odd about that is ShadowMarsh isn’t by any stretch a comedic movie – most of it is pretty dramatic, including the rather somber (if not disappointing) finale, and the scenes which veered toward humor just felt out-of-place tonally to me.

Little of this is the fault of the performances. Ellen Woomer does well as the lead, dealing with being uprooted from her life in Michigan and the death of her mother. Mike Ferguson (Amityville Uprising, Devilreaux, Amityville Hex, Moon of the Blood Beast) is strong as an uncle with a criminal history, and his friendship with the sheriff, played by Lew Temple (Halloween, The Texas Chainsaw Massacre: The Beginning, The Devil’s Rejects) is among my favorite parts of the film.

I suspect more probably could have been done with Shani Drake and Corrinne Mica (Evil Everywhere), but in their limited roles, I think both were fine. Dave Sheridan (Blood Craft, The Special, Victor Crowley, Scary Movie) was mostly a one-note character, but got a hint of depth toward the finale, and Felissa Rose (mostly known for Sleepaway Camp, though has been in tons of horror films, many of them with Dave Sheridan) pops up too, though I don’t think she adds much.

Naturally, I was disappointed with this one. The finale had potential, and as I said, it was dramatic, but it also felt largely inconclusive. The horror aspects especially felt light, as blood splatter hitting trees was 95% of what they had going on. Certainly the highlights were the characters and potentially the atmosphere, along with the setting. I’m not sure where this was filmed, but I did think that the town and nearby forest looked good.

Overall, though, ShadowMarsh was indeed a disappointment. I don’t think it’s an awful movie, and certainly I believe that the film had some good potential, but I don’t think it got there. There are definitely worse things that someone could be watching, but that said, I believe this is a movie I’ll not soon be recommending to anyone.

5.5/10

He’s Watching (2022)

Directed by Jacob Estes [Other horror films: Don’t Let Go (2019)]

I’m not entirely sure what to make out of this one.

Very much a home-made movie, He’s Watching deals with two siblings (Iris Serena Estes and Lucas Steel Estes) who are home alone while their parents are in the hospital with a mysterious illness, and find themselves dealing with something beyond their control.

This illness I referenced isn’t COVID, but I did, at first, think that’s where this one was going. While out and about, Iris and Lucas see very few people – the streets seem empty, and they’re wearing facemasks. I don’t believe the credits listed the filming location, but I would suspect Los Angeles, which certainly makes sense given their lockdown during the time.

Here, though, the illness seems to be primarily a danger to adults – hospitals are overwhelmed, there’s little movement outside, and when Iris and Lucas are trying to get some help, they’re unable to find any adults able to do so.

He’s Watching isn’t really about the illness, though – it’s about the two young siblings getting on each other’s nerves and trying to contend with some malevolent entity around their house. What with odd video clips being sent to them, or messages left for them, and what may be some occasional possession, they certainly have a lot on their shoulders at their age.

This movie’s quite bizarre. It feels like a low-budget movie in the vein of Clownz R Us or Loon, but it’s not like Jacob Estes, the director, had to go this route. He directed a 2019 horror film called Don’t Let Go with has a 6.4/10 on IMDb with around 12,000 votes (a movie, I should say, that completely got past me), a 2004 crime/drama film called Mean Creek that has a 7.2/10 with over 33,000 votes, and a 2011 dark comedy starring Tobey fucking Maguire called The Details. I can’t say I’ve heard the name Jacob Estes before today, but he’s definitely not a no-one.

I imagine He’s Watching is largely a family project. The characters Iris and and Lucas are played by, you guessed it, Iris Serena Estes and Lucas Steel Estes. The film has a rather experimental feel going on – while I’d hesitate to label it avant-garde, or even disjointed, there’s definitely a lot left up to interpretation, especially toward the finale.

There are some creepy scenes here and there, along with some uncomfortable scenes, made all the worse by us never really finding out what’s going on. I was even reminded of Desolation Wilderness, though this movie isn’t quite that extreme. Still, portions of the film were wholly experimental, and while I imagine that could turn some off, I thought there was a charm to it.

I also wanted to mention that I appreciated many of the techniques used here. I’ve said many times before that I’m not a behind-the-scenes guy, and I’ve never made a movie, so I don’t have the vocabulary to describe the techniques utilized in the film, but I can say that for a film of this style, I thought some rather creative shots were taken, and though the story feels more like a fever dream than a well-thought out plot at times, I was still impressed.

Naturally, I have no idea how old either Iris Serena Estes or Lucas Steel Estes are, but both did quite a decent job. I was somewhat amused by the fact that Lucas was always able to decipher the hidden messages in the mess of random objects left around the house, as though he’s some entity specialist, but given that these two are actually siblings, I thought they felt quite authentic.

He’s Watching was a far more involved film than I was expecting. While I immediately compared this to Clownz R Us in my mind, there’s really not that many similarities. I don’t think this movie is that great, but I do think it was plenty ambitious, and I can appreciate that in this case. I also found the credits oddly creative, and some of the sequences (especially the narrated dream sequences of Iris) quite captivating.

Honestly, this was a deeper movie than I expected. I don’t think it was good, and I can certainly understand some of the negative reception it’s gotten, but I also have to fully admit to finding the experience fascinating. Whether I liked it or not is entirely up for grabs, but I can easily see myself giving this another go in the future, and that has to mean something.

For now, I’ll give this one a below-average rating, but I don’t think it’s near as awful as some people are suggesting.

6/10

The Menu (2022)

Directed by Mark Mylod [Other horror films: N/A]

I wasn’t quite sure what to expect from The Menu – I’d see bits of the trailer, and I could tell it was obviously a high budget production, but as to the story or tone, I wasn’t sure. Sure, I’d seen the film labeled both a black comedy and a satire, but it’s hard to know if that applies without actually seeing the movie for yourself.

And after seeing it, I can say that it was most definitely unique. Insofar as how much I enjoyed it, it’s hard to say – based off the story, I sort of wish I liked it a bit more. That said, I still found it quite a solid and interesting film, and while it’s quite atypical in many aspects, I do think it’s worth experiencing.

First off, I have to admit I got some vibes of The Dinner Party at points. The Dinner Party was a movie I despised quite a bit, as I found it overly pretentious in pretty much every way. The difference, though, is that The Menu is making fun of such pretensions – being a satire and going after the wealthy, such can be expected – and I thought that The Menu did a great job at that.

I should also add that while ‘black comedy’ may be a suitable description of the film, there’s not a ton of laugh-out-loud moments. There were a couple – that line about substitutions cracked me up – but more often than not, it’s a dark and sometimes uncomfortable film that may have you chuckling now and again, but outright guffaws, at least in my view, are rare. I don’t think that this hurts the film any – it’s sort of nice to see a film that’s more low-key with it’s humor – but I did think it was worth mentioning.

There are a bunch of performances in this film, but only a handful really stand out to me. First-and-foremost, I have to give a lot of props to Ralph Fiennes. This was an absolutely stellar performance from Fiennes (who I know mostly as Voldemort from the Harry Potter films, but was also in Red Dragon), and he nailed his role beautifully. In fact, I’m only more torn on Anya Taylor-Joy (The New Mutants, Marrowbone, The VVitch: A New-England Folktale, Last Night in Soho, Split) because Fiennes did such a solid job, and Taylor-Joy’s character was sort of hard to get a read on (though this was by design).

Otherwise, while there are some familiar faces, such as John Leguizamo (Vanishing on 7th Street, Night Owl, Land of the Dead), Reed Birney (The Hunt), and Janet McTeer (Jessica Jones), no one else adds near as much as Fiennes or Taylor-Joy. Nicholas Hoult (Warm Bodies) was a prick much of the time, but he got dressed down beautifully, so that was fun. Overall great performances in this film, despite the fact only a few really stand out.

Given this is more a satire than a straight-out horror-comedy, none of the violence is over-the-top, or at least humorously over-the-top. There are some disturbing scenes of emotional distress – not something I’d usually mention, to be sure – which are beautifully uncomfortable, and the violence we get is all fun

Tentatively, because The Menu isn’t an easy movie to exactly describe, I’d say that I enjoyed it. I can’t say I loved it, but I did find it a rather unique experience, and for that fact alone, I’d argue it may well be worth seeing, as I imagine the right audience would get a kick out of this one.

8/10

Last the Night (2022)

Directed by Nick Leisure [Other horror films: N/A]

From the lukewarm reaction I’ve seen in regards to Last the Night, I was sort of surprised by the fact it came out alright. No, I don’t think Last the Night’s a good movie, but I don’t think it’s that bad, either. Middling, with a few interesting ideas within, Last the Night might be a good time to some.

My prime interest with this movie came from the plot – during the COVID lockdowns, a teacher struggling with his mental health breaks down and plans to kill a group of his students. Naturally, this is a movie that benefits greatly from the COVID-19 backdrop, and I think it does give the film extra flavor.

Before I hit more on this, though, let’s talk about my COVID experiences. In Indiana, we never took COVID that seriously – it’s true that we were on lockdown for a bit (which is one of the reasons, on a side-note, that Libertarian Donald Rainwater got 11.4% in the 2020 Indiana gubernatorial election), but Indiana’s a conservative state, and as we know, COVID-19 doesn’t impact conservatives because Jesus.

Okay, admittedly I’m getting side-tracked. My point is, I was never on lockdown. At the time, I worked at a supermarket, which made me an “essential worker.” While others were encouraged to stay inside their homes, I went to work and made an extra dollar an hour – not nearly as impressive as it sounds when you figure in the taxes.

I guess what I’m trying to say is that while I heard so many stories of extreme isolation during COVID due to the lockdowns, I never experienced that. Watching Bo Burnham’s Inside was eye-opening to what that type of situation would be like to one’s mental health. I never had to deal with lockdown, and I can imagine that plenty of people, especially students who had to try to get used to E-learning and teachers who had to try and teach on Zoom, had a really hard time.

Brian Austin Green’s character is an interesting one. He’s been a history teacher for a long time, and is just tired. His personal life is in shambles (his wife left him), and being forced to stay indoors all day just isn’t working for him. He’s also somewhat conservative – seems a supporter of the Second Amendment, not interested in mask mandates, and professed his favorite president as Theodore Roosevelt (which is at least a better option than Ronald Reagan). And when he hears some students making fun of him on a zoom call, he just snaps.

There’s not too many horror films that focus on teachers going after students, but I did once see a 2015 movie called The Lesson, which has a similar idea. That movie had more going for – while both The Lesson and Last the Night have quite a bit of set-up before we get to the action, I think it worked far better in the former. Even so, I appreciated that this movie went with a plot that was timely to the situation we found ourselves in, even if it didn’t turn out an amazing movie.

A lot of credit should go to Brian Austin Green (Chromeskull: Laid to Rest 2, Don’t Blink), as he really gives his character his all. Toward the end, he was a bit much at times, but overall, his performance was solid. As far as the four teens go – Acoryé White, Makena Taylor, Julia Quang, and David Valdes – I’d say that Taylor did the best, though all four do decent. It did seem that Quang’s character felt like she needed to be fleshed out more – at one point in the film, she’s adamant about not leaving without her phone, and I was hoping there was a reason for that, which we never got – but overall, the performances were good.

Like I said earlier, there’s about 45 minutes or so of build-up before we get to the action, and when we do get to the action, it’s pretty much four teens being chased down by a guy with a gun. Certainly still horror, but there’s a strong thriller/suspense feel to this movie as well, and that might also play a part in some of the lukewarm reaction I’ve seen from this. It doesn’t feel like a typical horror film a lot of the time, and while I don’t think that’s a bad thing, it is noticeable.

There are some good scenes, though, of shotgun carnage. We don’t see much in the way of blood, but there’s a quick scene in which someone gets shot in the back, leading to blood splatter on a window. A couple of more emotional scenes are here too, along with a couple of awkward ones, which allows the tension to ratchet up.

Honestly, I didn’t have a problem with most of Last the Night. I didn’t think it was good, but I was engaged throughout, and like I said, I found the plot somewhat interesting. The execution could have been improved a bit, and I do think the movie’s a little below average, but I definitely think that, if the movie sounds like your type of thing, you shouldn’t be dissuaded by the more negative comments.

6/10

The Ghost Lights (2022)

Directed by Timothy Stevens [Other horror films: N/A]

I didn’t quite know what to expect when going into The Ghost Lights, but I do know that what I got wasn’t exactly it. This low-budget science-fiction/horror/drama mix does have a few solid ideas and performances, especially toward the finale, but I can’t say the whole of the film was exactly to my liking.

The base idea is solid, though – the daughter of a recently-deceased newspaper reporter goes down to the ghost town of Terlingua, Texas to figure out what the ghost lights, a topic her father had worked on, are. It’s nothing special, but it has promise. We have some mysterious lights, potential government agents, superstitious locals – the elements are all here.

It has to be said, though, that a lot of The Ghost Lights felt like set-up for a larger story. Though the film is around an hour and 26 minutes, it’s not until an hour and 12 minutes in that Katreeva Phillips’ character actually reaches the small town of Terlingua. I will give the movie props for having a decently emotional finale, but I still don’t know if it was worth it. Seems like a classic case of all hat, and no cattle.

Katreeva Phillips did decent with her role. I will admit that she started out a bit shaky, and I found some of her character’s choices obnoxious, but I did applaud the emotion she brought into the role. Related, I didn’t actually care for John Francis McCullagh’s character for most of this film, but I do think he too shined in the finale. Billy Blair (Nocturna, Cherokee Creek) was perhaps the most consistent performance, and though Timothy Stevens’ character didn’t have much character, he still looked occasionally threatening.

As solid as portions of the finale were, though, there was just too many unanswered questions here, such as what exactly the ghost lights are, and what the man in black’s (potential government agent) goal was, and what, if any, interest did the United States government have in mysterious lights. It’s not like Howard’s Mill, where it makes sense that we wouldn’t find out these answers – these are things that could have been addressed in the film, had they wanted to do so.

All this said, I will say that the cinematography looked quite nice, and because they filmed in Texas, much of the scenery does look lovely. The special effects, when they use them, seem decent, and again, I thought the ending, despite leaving us completely in the dark about everything, had solid emotional resonance.

The Ghost Lights might make an interesting lower-budget science fiction movie – one, according to the credits, was at least partially funded by Indiegogo – but as a horror film, I think The Ghost Lights was rather lacking in meat. I wouldn’t go as far as to say the film is bad, and to the right audience, it may hit the right spot, but personally speaking, it’s not one that I think I’d spend time with again.

5.5/10

Nope (2022)

Directed by Jordan Peele [Other horror films: Get Out (2017), Us (2019)]

Perhaps among one of the more hyped films I’ve seen from the genre in the last couple of years, Nope was a pretty mysterious movie from the beginning. I never got much in the way of plot from the trailer, and I’m guessing most people walked into this one knowing only that Jordan Peele was at the helm, and that was enough.

I enjoyed Get Out well enough, and I’ve not yet seen Us, but I can say that Nope wasn’t really my thing. No doubt it’s a unique movie in many aspects – while the narrative structure isn’t abnormal, the characters and plot certainly are – and more so, the movie looked stellar on a cinematography level. Plenty of people seemed to enjoy it well enough, and I certainly don’t doubt their sincerity, as there’s potentially a lot to enjoy, especially toward the finale.

Among my many issues, though, are the characters, few of whom I understood. Daniel Kaluuya’s character recently lost his father, so the fact he’s so non-expressive can be excused, but I didn’t get Keke Palmer’s personality at all. Perhaps it’s just too loud for me (and apparently she’s a musician, which I didn’t know until writing this review), but I found her character very difficult to understand. Related, Michael Wincott’s (Alien Resurrection) character seemed so odd to me, as did Steven Yeun’s (Mayhem). At the very least, Brandon Perea sort of felt like a person, so that’s something.

It’s not just the characters, though – I didn’t get why they threw in the random subplot with the chimpanzee that went ape-shit (pun moderately intended). Perhaps they felt it thematically-appropriate, but it just felt random and unnecessary to me, especially as it didn’t really add much to Yeun’s character.

The finale did have a decent amount going for it, and again, the plot here – dealing with an unidentified flying object in the California skies – went in an interesting direction, but I also have to be forthcoming and say that, given the movie was two hours and ten minutes long, I can’t imagine wanting to sit through this one again, especially as I didn’t relate to any of the characters.

Nope just felt odd to me. Certainly some people enjoyed it, and I think the marketing was pretty impressive, but on the whole, I can’t say I really liked this. I didn’t hate it or anything, but it’s not my idea of enjoyment. Oh, and I also have to point out that I don’t care for the title – I don’t know if it was trying to be funny, but as a title, Nope doesn’t do it for me. Still, the movie worked for some people, and perhaps, if I see this in the future, I’ll enjoy it a tad more.

6/10

So Cold the River (2022)

Directed by Paul Shoulberg [Other horror films: N/A]

For a couple of reasons, I was really hoping that I could have a good time with So Cold the River. I mean, read the plot – does it not sound intriguing? Because of that mild hope, I find myself quite disappointed with this one, and most unfortunately of all, I don’t even exactly know why.

Based on a 2010 novel of the same name, written by Michael Koryta, So Cold the River follows a filmmaker’s attempt to discover the life of one Bradford Campbell. What makes this stand out more, on a personal level, is that the movie was filmed in Indiana – both West Baden Springs and French Lick. Now, to be sure, these towns are in southern Indiana, whereas I live in northern Indiana, but still, it’s nice to have some local flavor.

Even so, while the movie definitely had potential – and more so, definitely had a decent production value behind it – I found much of this underwhelming, and as I alluded to, I’m not even sure why, to be honest. Part of it, I think, has to do with the fact that I still don’t have a clear image of who Bradford Campbell was. They dip into his past a little bit, but I just felt there was more to the story that they never got to.

I’m also not wild about Bethany Joy Lenz’s character. Even from the beginning, before the random flashes and visions and gulps of water, I just couldn’t get into her. And speaking of the water, there’s some importance given to a bottle of water in this film. No idea what that importance is – there was a scene at the end that might have explained it to someone, but certainly not me – so there’s another thing that felt off.

That’s probably the main issue. Plenty of threads were interesting – the Rebirth celebration, the bottle of water (which is connected to the origins of Bradford Campbell), the hotel – but nothing was tied together particularly well. It hurts all the more because, as I said, I think a lot of these elements had potential, and as a Hoosier, I can’t help but root for movies made in my state.

None of this is to say the performances were poor. Though I didn’t care for her character, I thought Bethany Joy Lenz (Thinner) did fine. More interesting to me was Katie Sarife (Annabelle Comes Home); her character could have had more depth, but at least she was involved in the finale. Kevin Cahoon was pretty fun as a cheery hotel worker (“That’s a fun interpretation of formal attire”), and while I think more could have been done with his character, Andrew J. West (Nightmare Code) had a good look to him.

More than anything, watching this movie makes me want to read the 2010 novel. I’ve never read anything by Michael Koryta – in fact, I’ve never heard the name – but I have to imagine that the novel is more fleshed out than the film is, and I wouldn’t mind giving it a try.

The production value behind this film was solid. The filming locations looked great – we even get extended scenes in the West Baden Springs Hotel, which just looked beautiful. If you’ve not seen what the hotel looks like, you’re missing out.

Everything looked nice in this movie, and I think it’s a damn shame that So Cold the River didn’t have the story to back it up. I will say I thought the finale was decent, but still, shining a bit more light onto exactly why the things that were happening were happening would have been nice.

5.5/10

Smart House (2023)

Directed by John Oak Dalton [Other horror films: The Girl in the Crawlspace (2018), Scarecrow County (2019)]

There are some movies that have pretty solid ideas, or pretty solid stories, and the execution gets in the way of allowing the film to be all it can be. I don’t think that’s the exact case with Smart House – elements of the film were perfectly suitable – but as an overall package, I have to admit that I was hoping for a bit more, especially in regards to the finale.

The idea behind the film was pretty unique, though – an ASMR streamer (Iabou Windimere) is held hostage by her hacked smart house, and her father (Tom Cherry), a hacker, does what he can under his own limitations (he’s on house arrest after hacking into the Pentagon) to save his daughter.

It’s a movie very much entrenched in our modern way of life – while I myself have never seen, nor been near, a smart house, I imagine they exist, and on the back-end of the film, what with the father trying to help his daughter out, a lot of hacker terminology is thrown around, and it’s that portion of the film I found most unique. To be sure, hacking has been a thing for decades, but as someone who knows little about that subculture, it felt modern to me.

I have to say two things, first, before proceeding. One, I’ve never understood ASMR. I know it’s popular, and apparently has it’s fanbase, but I never saw the appeal. That said, I’m a big fan of letting people have the freedom to enjoy what they enjoy, so if you’re into ASMR, keep doing your thing, brahs. I also wanted to mention that I was sent an advanced screener of this film prior to it’s official release – now, I didn’t watch this until after the film screened in Chicago, but I wanted to be open about how I was able to watch this one.

Where Smart House shines is the story, I feel. Windermere’s character is staying at her father’s smart house (he designed the technology, but because of his house arrest, isn’t allowed to actually be around technology, so he got screwed over there) and has to deal with a potentially abusive ex. There’s a bit of mystery surrounding how exactly Cassandra (the name of the smart house technology – think SIRI, or whatever those fancy phone things are called) got hacked, and who hacked it, but it’s also true that there’s not necessarily a big focus on this.

When the smart house actually begins threatening Windermere, you’d hope that things get more tense, and to an extent, they do. Under threat from the smart house, she begins a livestream, reading, in her dulcet ASMR tones, portions of Revelation, and no, it doesn’t sound any less creepy being read that way. On a side-note, I’m not quite clear what actual harm the smart house could have done to her – sure, it can keep her locked in the house, but what can it actually do to hurt her? – but perhaps I missed something.

It’s during her live-streams that I have a couple of points that veer negative. For one, while she’s doing her thing, we get footage of people listening to the stream. Well, that’s what I’m guessing it’s supposed to be – we just see a bunch of young people looking at their laptops. We never see what’s on their laptops – well, we do once, and it just seemed like the guy was checking his emails, amusingly enough – and it seems very much like stock footage. I get the point, in that it showed the audience she had, but it rung rather false to me, and sort of took me out of the film.

Another thing, and this might be super nit-picky (but to be fair, I was super nit-picky when reviewing We Are the Missing, so at least I’m consistent), but it has to do with the comment section on the stream. She was getting anywhere from 60,000 to 900,000 viewers on her stream, and the comments were coming in just as slowly as always. I’ve used Twitch before, and I’ve watched live streams on YouTube – once you get upward of 300 viewers, you’ll be hard-pressed to keep up with the comments, even if it’s a follower-only chat (a function that Twitch allows). Sure, that wouldn’t make for easy reading in a movie, but realistically, there’s no way she’d not get hundreds of thousands of more comments.

One other thing I wanted to touch on, though I’m not quite sure how to. When the hacker father attempts to help out his daughter, he reaches out to hacker friends of his. I’m not clear how he does it – he plays an orphaned game he saved on a flash drive that apparently his hacker friends are always online on? It’s here that I need to fully state that I’m not a computer science guy. I don’t know a thing about how computers work, so naturally, I don’t know a thing about hacking. It probably makes sense, I just can’t understand that.

Regardless, though, once he’s talking to these hacker friends of his, we sort of get their avatars as each of them speak up. The whole screen becomes the avatar, and it just looks somewhat odd. Actually, I was reminded of some of the visuals from the beginning of Tales from the Hood 2, a comparison I don’t like making, because this film is overall far better, but that’s just what came to mind. I understood the point of doing it that way, but I just wonder if it couldn’t have been filmed in, or executed in, a better way.

As the lead, I do think that Iabou Windimere was mostly solid. She had a few shaky pieces of dialogue, and I still don’t exactly know what she had to physically fear from the smart house, but she was decent in the role. Far more interesting to me personally, though, was Tom Cherry. I praised Cherry in Scarecrow County, and I liked him here too. His character was an interesting one (and tragic, considering what he gave up to save his daughter), and he’s right when he says that it makes no sense to enjoy Jon Pertwee’s Doctor over Patrick Troughton’s (context may be necessary here, but I’m not getting into it).

Otherwise, there’s not much insofar as physical cast members. Erin Hoodlebrink pops up for a bit, and her scene is pretty fun (in part because she shares it with Cherry), but most of the other names of import provided only their voices. For instance, voicing the smart house, is Brinke Stevens, a legend of low budget horror (known for, among many other things, The Slumber Party Massacre, Nightmare Sisters, and Victoria’s Shadow). The performances aren’t the most important thing here, though they’re mostly decent.

The finale here felt somewhat anticlimactic to me. Honestly, it all comes back to the smart house. I still don’t quite get how the smart house could have harmed Windimere’s character. Even if I did get that, the fact that much of the action is a hacker talking to other hackers and then the main antagonist hacker (in a scene that just felt too vague for me), well, that wasn’t exactly ideal. There’s not really any more action toward the end of this film than we got early on, and that was disappointing.

I’ve said a lot here, but I think I can boil it down to some base elements. I liked much of the story, but the execution didn’t really do it for me. I would have preferred a bit more detail behind the individual who hacked into the smart house and why they did so, and overall, though I don’t think it’s a exceptionally poor film, I would have to say that I preferred Scarecrow County to this.

5/10

The Hoot Owl (2022)

Directed by Jason Rader [Other horror films: N/A] & Jason Von Godi [Other horror films: N/A]

I can’t say that much about The Hoot Owl stands out. This low-budget slasher, filmed on location in the unincorporated community of Hagansport, Texas, did feature some okay gore, but despite being just an hour and 11 minutes, it felt a bit slow, and the massacre toward the end doesn’t really make up for the build-up.

Certainly, though, it was nice to get to know the characters here. It helps that generally, the cast is strong. Katharine Franco was perhaps the most forgettable, Carl Bailey (The Lotus, Evil Under the Skin) the most shaky, especially with some of the dialogue he had. Still, Augustine Frizzell made for a fair lead, and the friendship between J.D. Brown (Late Fee, Hunters, The Cemetery, Cross Bearer, The Burnt House) and Jason Skeen (By the Devil’s Hands) felt pretty authentic. Oh, and as someone who enjoys the occasional ganja, Roger Schwermer Jr.’s character spoke to me.

Still, it wasn’t until the final 18 minutes when anything of that much interest happened. And to be fair, when the gore came along, it was decent – a man’s head was sort of torn in half with a chain, someone else’s head was lowered into a bear trap, another got impaled through the eye. There was even a rather gruesome childbirth, shown in more detail than I personally cared for, toward the end. For a lower-budget film, the gore here showed a lot of promise.

The story, though, wasn’t exactly great. It had the basics down, but as around 50 minutes of the movie is just build-up and character-building, almost entirely without anything else going on, I can’t say it was that engaging. It was fun to set the film in rural Texas; that location was on point. I don’t think it makes the rest of the film much better, though.

We did have a bit of a psychological element toward the end regarding Augustine Frizzell’s character, and while I think it could have been executed better, it was still okay. Nothing game-changing, or even that surprising, but at least it had a little flavor.

Overall, though, I don’t think The Hoot Owl is a movie that will end up being that memorable at all. For a lower-budget slasher film, it might be okay for a watch or two, but I don’t think it’ll become a cult classic anytime soon, and I definitely think it could have done some things better. Killer poster, though.

5.5/10