Pet Sematary II (1992)

Directed by Mary Lambert [Other horror films: Pet Sematary (1989), Strange Frequency (2001), Urban Legends: Bloody Mary (2005), The Attic (2007), Mega Python vs. Gatoroid (2011)]

I wasn’t a big fan of the first Pet Sematary, nor was I a big fan of the book. But boy, Pet Sematary II is even worse, and I cannot overstate just how much I dislike the direction that this one took.

As far as performances go, it was briefly nice to see Clancy Brown (of The Shawshank Redemption) here, but then his character quickly becomes one of the biggest dicks imaginable. Unfortunately, his character is only utilized in worse ways once he’s brought back to life, but I’ll touch on that atrocity a bit later. Anthony Edwards was somewhat enjoyable here, especially toward the end of the film, but he wasn’t anything special.

The two main kids, Edward Furlong and Jason McGuire, were okay. I sort of liked the bond between the two, but much like Edwards’ performance, I don’t think either one was particularly special. McGuire certainly was at his best, though, with his asshole step-father (Brown’s character).

It’s with Brown’s character that I really started losing interest in the film. Once he’s about to strike his step-son and gets killed, the boys decide to bury him in the burial ground to bring him back, and back he comes. How the wife didn’t notice that her husband was essentially a zombie blows my mind, but really, any scene past Clancy’s death was pretty much coming to unwilling eyes, because the whole “My step-father’s a dangerous zombie, help me,” was just so stupid, and I didn’t care whatsoever.

The whole idea of a son desperately wanting his mother back was touching, and I do think some of the finale was perfectly okay. But boy, I could definitely have done without the other portions, and overall, though I didn’t care for the first movie that much, I found this even harder to swallow.

4/10