Curse of Halloween (2006)

Directed by Jeremy Isbell [Other horror films: Angus Valley Farms (2005), Madman (2006), Angus Valley Farms 2 (2008)]

This is one of those movies which is sort of hard to describe, and I do mean that in one of the worst ways possible.

What didn’t work here (a list which would indeed be of an impressive length) really didn’t work, and due to that, almost nothing about this film is to be recommended. The biggest problem is the lack of cohesion, along with the framing and conclusion, along with everything else.

The story itself is of moderate interest, in which a group of individuals are sort of trapped nearby a house, and some type of curse/spirit/ghost/something is killing them off (sort of), along with causing delusions. The characters get separated early on, and because delusions are part of this curse’s/spirit’s/ghost’s/something’s modus operandi, it’s hard to tell which characters are even together. I swear, this one female character had two, perhaps three, scenes in which it looked like she died. Same with one of the guys.

With a higher budget, this type of confusion might almost be okay. But instead, Curse of Halloween is one of the cheapest films I’ve seen in a little while. Really, I don’t know what else would be expected, given that this film is dated as 2006 on IMDb, yet still hasn’t garnered more than six votes. Part of me wonders if this film was ever supposed to be released, as I definitely got an unfinished product feel about it.

The few who have gone out of their way to watch this film seem to share the same confusion I have. Both A Slash Above and Dread Central have reviews for this film up, and both gave it no stars. Because I’m an idiot, I’ll throw the movie a few bones, despite the fact that this is on a level of ineptness that few other films could match. There’s one scene with decent nudity. That said, there’s also a ten-minute long boat ride (I can’t even begin to describe how boring these ten minutes were – no dialogue, just atrocious electronic music as characters who I don’t know party on a boat), so take that with a grain of salt.

The best thing I can say about this film is that it’s just an hour. On the other hand, the fact that it’s an hour just goes to show that I’ve wasted sixty minutes of my life on this. Also, the title of the film is okay (unfortunately, there’s nothing Halloween-ish in the movie, and in fact Christmas ornaments are present during one scene).

Yeah, there’s nothing here to go out of your way to see unless you want to see some truly awful ways to make a movie. From beginning (the blubbering of a man threatening to commit suicide due to the horrors he experience) to end (the aforementioned awful boat-ride), this is an utter mess.

1.5/10