The Nail Gun Massacre (1985)

Directed by Bill Leslie [Other horror films: N/A] & Terry Loftin [Other horror films: N/A]

While certainly a gory movie, everything else was a bit of a hassle to sit through, and ultimately, much is left to be desired after finishing this.

The one thing this early straight-to-video horror gets right is the gore. It’s not always great, and it’s moderately derivative, but at the very least, this movie has it. The body count is pretty high here, too – at least ten to twelve on-screen deaths, which is sort of nice. Unfortunately, that’s sort of all this film can really boast about.

Everything else is quite shoddy. I’m even a fan of SOV horror – I enjoyed Night Ripper (1986), Cannibal Campout (1988), Houseboat Horror (1989), Spine (1986), and a handful of others. This film, though, just wasn’t as enjoyable as any of the ones I listed. It’s a shame, as this movie could have played as a serious rape-revenge film, like I Spit on Your Grave, but instead of taking that route, it goes the ‘serial killer making terrible jokes’ direction, and it came across as rather ridiculous, especially given the killer’s backstory.

I don’t expect great acting, but at least one or two performances that stand out would be nice. Instead, all we got here was Ron Queen, who was amusing only in the fact he always had the same neutral expression on his face. Queen is literally the only one who really stood out in any way, which is amazing, as for a low-budget SOV film, this movie doesn’t really have that small a cast.

I think that this movie could have been better if they had chosen to approach the material differently. Instead of making it a product of the 80’s, if they went more for the feel of the aforementioned I Spit on Your Grave or Toolbox Murders, it’d have been a bit better. For an 80’s film, this movie was just dry, and even when it was trying to add a little spice with the killer’s idiotic comments, it just made it worse. Aside from some decent gore, The Nail Gun Massacre isn’t that worth watching, which is really a shame, as it really had potential.

5/10