Saltwater (2016)

Directed by A.B. Stone [Other horror films: Lake Placid vs. Anaconda (2015)]

And yet another Syfy shark original. More commonly known as Atomic Shark, Saltwater is pretty much the movie you might expect if you’re thinking about sharks that have been infected with atomic radiation.

First off, though, I have no idea why the original title of this is Saltwater. When I first watched this movie, IMDb had Atomic Shark listed as the original title (which makes sense), but sometime after that, they changed it. They list “Saltwater: Atomic Shark ” as a reissued title, but the film itself says “Atomic Shark” on the title screen, and more to the point, what does saltwater have to do with specifically with atomic sharks? I just don’t get it.

To complicate matters, IMDb has a listing for Atomic Shark (2016), a separate movie. Saltwater (2016), on IMDb, is listed as directed by A.B. Stone. Atomic Shark (2016) is listed by director Lisa Palenica. At the time of this writing (October 19th, 2021), Atomic Shark has 296 votes with a 2.7/10, and Saltwater has 696 votes with a 3.6/10. Both films have identical plots, though that’s likely an user error. No idea what’s going on, but Saltwater was the film I watched, and if Atomic Shark is similar, I don’t have an interest in it.

Regardless, the story is rather generic. A bunch of lifeguards on the California coast have to deal with a mysterious shark that’s glowing red, because, as you may have guessed it, it’s been around a lot of atomic radiation. So have a lot of the fish life – burnt, dead fish keep washing up on the shore (and apparently are served at a local restaurant, as there’s a scene in which a food celebrity blows up after having some of the cuisine), which is good fun.

I couldn’t help but think of a couple of other movies when watching this. First that came to mind is, and I don’t think I could have helped this comparison, Toxic Shark. Actually, I’m somewhat sure I first saw both of these films around the same time (October 2017), so that doesn’t help. Toxic Shark has a much more interesting set-up, but has elements I didn’t care for (such as zombies caused from the toxins), and there’s also Malibu Shark Attack, which has the same idea (lifeguards deal with sharks), but I tend to think that one’s more based in reality than what we got here.

Rachele Brooke Smith made for a pretty solid lead, and probably one of the most competent protagonists I’ve seen in a shark movie in a while. Bobby Campo (The Final Destination and Seance: The Summoning) and Jeff Fahey (Psycho III) had their moments also, but pretty much everyone else was insufferable. Mariah Bonner’s (Mask Maker) character was awful, Isaiah LaBorde was awful, Adam Ambruso, again, awful. Jessica Kemejuk reminded me of Chelan Simmons’ character from Malibu Shark Attack (both are terrible lifeguards with other concerns), but unlike Simmons, Kemejuk got virtually no redemption before she was #Eaten (and that’s actually a joke – her character was concerned with becoming viral, and so used terms like “hashtag” and “you jelly” seriously).

None of the special effects were good, but hey, at least we got an atomic shark, so that’s cool. When the shark blows up, there’s a mushroom cloud, which you can probably expect, but the mushroom cloud has the shape of a shark’s jaw and teeth, so that was somewhat stupid. Not surprising, but stupid.

Overall, Saltwater isn’t a great movie, but it’s no worse than a lot of the other mediocre shark movies Syfy churns out, so take that as you will.

6/10